|How I would look everyday without power|
So let's hash this thing out for all of you who have been anticipating the premiere of this show, or for those of you who probably won't have time to watch because you have "real jobs" or "prefer to read" or are "watching Downton Abbey instead". WARNING. SPOILER ALERT. The basic premise of the show is the power goes out for good. The pilot episode starts out in present day Chicago, the day of the blackout. A concerned father busts into his home while his kids watch TV like zombies and his wife (who was on LOST) prepares for no more Internet, hairdryers, washing machines, toilets, Sunday HBO line-ups or GPS. They might as well jump off a bridge right now.
Cut-to Bella's dad from Twilight and his friend/ homosexual lover (?) in a Mustang on the highway discussing dating protocol while Not Bella's Dad tries to download nudie pics onto his iPhone. The previously mentioned concernicus dad calls Chief Swan, because they're broskis, to warn him about the blackout, when BOOM. No more light. No more cars. No more nudie picks for Bella's Dad's pervy friend.
|This is their life now.|
So anyway, Gus from Breaking Bad comes into the picture as a captain or something of the Militia- yeah, the freaking MILITIA- and demands that Concerned Dad comes with him to find his brother, Bella's Dad (His real character name is Miles- so... I'm still going to refer to him as Bella's Dad, Billy Burke, or Charlie Swan- deal with it). The younger brother of the, now adult, zombie kids doesn't like this situation. Side note- his name is Danny. Danny has Bieber hair and clearly suffers from youngest child-syndrome, meaning that he is a total weenie. So Danny grabs a gun and points it at Militia Gus in a strange and out-of-character act of bravery. Boom goes the dynamite/gun/ a bunch of people get shot and hacked with axes while Concerned Dad actually gets hit with a stray bullet. His last words to his children were to find their Uncle Miles (Charlie Swan) in Chicago. So naturally the older girl, Charlie- takes it upon herself to find U.M and save her brother (oh right I forgot to mention that Danny was taken away by Gus and his merry band of meat heads after the shoot out at the OK Corral).
|Charlie, British Betch, and Fat JJ Abrams.|
|"I am the Ethnic Mockingjay"|
|"You killed my brother, prepare to die"|
Meanwhile, Danny has escaped from his captors and is having asthma attacks outside some lady's house. Gus comes to find him and takes him away while the lady of the house scurries upstairs, whips out a flash drive and plugs it into her COMPUTER, and then turns on her LIGHTBULB and starts INSTANT MESSAGING someone. Is this bitch A? I call shenanigans.
If any of you have special requests for blog topics or shows for me to review- post a comment or tweet at me @shesarangasir. If your suggestion isn't totally ridiculous and I can both enjoy, and make fun of it- it may show up in future posts...maybe.